The Hum of the Universe

With the enhanced auditory abilities I’ve recently acquired (as a result of the acquisition of hearing aids) I notice what I can only describe as an otherworldly hum (not to be confused with tinnitus, which I also experience) which, if I might be metaphorical, I must interpret as the universe breathing, a wondrous sound Pythagoras might have been referring to (if he hadn’t been being metaphorical) as the music of the spheres.

I can imagine this auditory phenomenon as being primordial, originating with the Big Bang. How wonderful that modern technology has put me in touch, allowed me to realize, my connection to the universe.

Living and Dying in Anonymity

I’ve been thinking lately about legacy, how one might expect to be remembered by those who knew him. It would seem most of us would like to be remembered, preferably positively, as a contributing member of his community even as he may have recoiled from participation, leadership rolls, maybe, in civic and religious organizations, being content maintaining a small coterie of friends as social norms require.

Having lived, as I have, in near obscurity, social anonymity for a long time I might expect little remembrance when I pass on, I suppose. But there’s still time. I do have a class reunion coming up. I wonder if my mates will remember me. To paraphrase Woody Allen: all one needs to do to be remembered is to show up.

Change

I find myself experiencing a fresh perspective, an awareness lately brought on by changes to my senses. As my capacity to hear and see decrease in function my general awareness is heightened. It’s as if the world of my existence is significantly changing one day to the next, as if I can sense the location of the earth changing as it moves through the rarified space it has never before occupied.

A new world one day to the next. How refreshing to realize the insignificance of the issues that had previously occupied so much of my attention. This new awareness has my looking forward to tomorrow morning with wonder. What will happen next?

Reunion

I just attended my high school class reunion. I must say I was a bit uneasy about going thinking as I did about certain uncomfortable relationships that I experienced during those high school days.

But I was pleasantly surprised at how welcoming everyone was, genuinely happy to see each other, no sense of the teenage cliques I remembered. And, the bullies had mellowed, were really quite pleasant to visit with.

How many years of maturing should it take, I wondered, for a group of diverse individuals to reach common empathy? In this case it was sixty.

A Fresh Perspective

The new reality I’m experiencing as a result of my altered vision and hearing (due to a recently acquired ‘floater’ in my right eye and the installation of electronic hearing assistance) has, without requiring too much imagination on my part, delivered me into a fresh realm of existence. Not exactly the astral plane, I guess, since I remain physically present and still craving goo pizza, but there is experiential difference in a good way. Required, as I am, to look harder results in my seeing more and hearing more clearly adds to the richness of my general experiencing.

I think lately of the blind character Geordi in the Star Trek series whose ‘visor’ not only restored his vision but provided him with superhuman ability to see.

Nothing superhuman about my sensory alterations but I am enjoying my new perspectives.

Embracing the Absurd

I’ve been thinking about the downside of logical analysis. At what point does reasoning, making decisions based on irrefutable fact become inadequate for certain kinds of understanding?

Is the realm of the supernatural, for instance, discounted in its entirety because it defies logical analysis? If we allow that there exists certain knowledge that lies beyond the rational then credence must be given to the absurd. Derision must necessarily be tempered regarding the illogical and ridiculous.

Unsound reasoning must be allowed. The very argument I make here is, of course, of a reasoned and logical sort but following the public discourse these days makes clear that such rational thinking is unnecessary as the absurd will remain beyond criticism well embedded in popular thought.

I have just rationalized why irrationality must be legitimized. How absurd.

How to Live Authentically

Some twentieth century thinkers spent considerable time trying to understand what, exactly, one can know about the world. They thought that the fundamental basis upon which our knowledge of the world rests is suspect, based, as it is, on imagined truths originating from cultural orientations that define reality in terms of conceptual dualisms. Human inclination was to seek a secure ground of being in God or, perhaps, science that could provide reliable answers in dark times of stress and desperation. Such grounding led to unverifiable premises that produced false assumptions about the nature of the world.
A number of these deep thinkers dismissed the reliance on the eternal and infinite as being outside the realm of finite human understanding. All that can be known for certain, they thought, are the facts that exist in this world. These guys thought a primordial ground of being as disclosed through conventional world views was not to be found. An honest search would instead reveal an abyss, a nothingness beneath the cultural veneer. To live an authentic life, they believed, one must man-up, face uncertainty, tempt fate and step away from the safety of familiarity.
Other philosophers of the time thought a subjective ground of being could be found. Realizing the freedom to do what one chose depended upon a spiritual component to lift such a person beyond causal necessity. This ground of being will be personal and dependent on a belief in an existence beyond factual knowledge.
I have to say I admire these great thinkers living as they did through difficult times, unstable finances and psychological angst, who spend so much time and energy pursing ideas that provide us all the opportunity to at least contemplate how we can live our lives authentically.

Mythical Thinking

I’ve been trying to understand, lately, what exactly perpetuates the fairly widespread ideas of conspiracy theory surfacing these days in the political sphere. It occurs to me that perhaps many of us are being visited in our thinking by a deep-seeded primal intuition: that appearance and reality are intertwined.
The problem with such thinking is that appearances change; what appeared to be one thing one day takes on different meaning at another time in another context. For mythic believers, a rigidity develops. The idea that once an ‘appearance’ is defined and locked in and what is thought to be the case must be the case, any sort of subtle change in or redefinition of what appeared to be the case can only be thought of in terms of conspiracy. Someone or something must be manipulating Truth.
I suppose one who engages in mythical thinking does realize a richly imaginative existence, one that can be shared with other like-minded conspiracy theorists, of which, it appears, there are many. One would hope, in the interests of a healthier society, reality will make an appearance at some point.


An Impractical Dreamer

In the winter of his eighteenth year this young man fell madly in love (well, it was a serious crush anyway). The object of his unrequited affection was a demure sweet young lady who turned the young man, usually easygoing and affable, into a tongue-tied moron (or so he thought and was in fact true).

The episode was simply reflective of the young man’s nature. He conjured imaginings of romantic scenarios; of heroic stances he might take. He lived in a world of fictional narratives reinforced by the heroic storylines he regularly indulged: good triumphs, tragedy is overcome.

It would seem in retrospect such an imaginative reality would soon be repressed but it was maintained far longer than it might have been by avoiding unpleasant confrontation, keeping a distance from uncertain challenges and living in an (overly) protective home environment. As a college student our young dreamer immersed himself in studies of an impersonal nature, solitary endeavors not requiring excessive personal connections. He had friends of course. College life teems with unassuming young people of an accepting nature, all thriving in an essentially responsibility free environment.

Eventually, over time, even an impractical dreamer will have to face harsh realities. The awakening for our young man came with the threat posed by the draft lottery and the likelihood of involuntary military service. Basic training was eye opening. The young man found himself verbally assaulted. Name calling the likes of which he had never previously encountered (but guessed often referred to perverse sexual acts) was common.

Military service didn’t cure the young man, didn’t redirect him toward a more functional pragmatism. Even now as he passes middle age the man finds himself entertaining flights of fancy. He has somehow been able to navigate through life being sufficiently useful as not to be a particular burden on society, you know, has basically paid his own way.

It’s good to know, I guess, that sometimes life provides a path for those who need to live in an alternative reality.

Mosquito as Collective

A recent camping trip has me reconsidering the nature of Mosquito. It’s natural, I suppose, to see the insects as existing in swarms of creatures genetically engineered to pursue the blood needed to reproduce. But I have become inclined to now see the insect not as individuals but as a single organism working to attack and acquire the essence of their Being.

A Supreme Mosquito directs through a common mind, drones to the front lines to distract the blood source while the more capable move in from behind to withdraw the coveted substance.

It seems pretty clear to me that Mosquito thrives as a collective intelligence.