Category Archives: life

The Rest of the Story

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I’ve been thinking lately about the story of Abraham and Isaac. Abraham, the father, is challenged by God to justify his faith by sacrificing his beloved son Isaac. The man and son make their way to the mountaintop, the son prostrates himself upon a rock, the father lifts a large knife………. but then God intervenes and acknowledges Abrahams unwavering faith.

After the event God assures Isaac that he was really in no danger, that it was only a test, but one has to wonder how Isaac thereafter felt about familial relationships, how he afterwards perceived his father’s mental health, how he might have wondered how benevolent God actually is and finally what it means to be truly alone in the world.

I guess the moral of the story is: beware of parents who claim to be in direct communication with a less than benevolent God.

Robert and Judy

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Robert and Judy have lived together in their small home in the country for a long time. Before they were married Robert lived alone in a small cabin. When Judy came to visit, she found that Robert harbored a weasel in the house. The animal was allowed free rein to come and go at will. According to Robert his unnamed companion kept the rodent population in check. After their marriage, Judy, finding the animal to be an unacceptable house guest saw to it a new house was built with a solid foundation.

Over the years, as will be the case for semi-isolated folks, idiosyncrasies have developed. Visitors are viewed a bit askance, long visits not encouraged and, as Judy might have expected, Robert has continued to harbor his excessive (in her opinion) attachment to the deer, wild turkeys, wood chucks and various other wild creatures that come around to be fed, which Robert continues to do with unerring regularity in order to keep them all nearby, while keeping them, in the interest of conjugal peace, out of the house.

As Robert’s health has begun to deteriorate, Judy, a registered nurse, diagnoses, treats and sees to it Robert gets needed medical attention while documenting his various skin maladies with color photos that she readily shares with whomever might be visiting. Clarence, reduced to physical specimen, shrugs off the attention, content to nap in his recliner until it’s time once again to feed his friends.

Narratives

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I’ve been thinking, lately, about pictorial narratives, wondering how personal experience might affect interpretations if the imagery contains a bit of ambiguity. Since we all have different life experiences, subliminal issues, it’s reasonable to assume pictorial interpretations will vary from one of us to the next.

And, if pictorial narratives are offered without explanation, one must assume a bit of mystery will present itself, which is, I think a good thing; it keeps the viewer pondering.

Scandanavian Angst

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I’ve been reading about a time before electricity and central heating when Scandanavian people existed much closer to their natural environment, when enduring the harshness of cold, ice and snow could be mind-bending. I guess living in the northern climes during long winter months provided reason enough to explain the psychological darkness, existential angst that invaded the minds of inhabitants.

The indigenous Sami, nomadic reindeer herders, their sole economic existence dependent on the health of their herds, were required to constantly move through the harsh winters as lichen fields were depleted and new grazing areas found. It’s no wonders the culture of the area produced narratives with few happy endings, stories of protagonists arriving finally at the realization of existential aloneness.

Edvard Munch: The Dead Mother and the child

A Reasoning Mind

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I’ve been reading and thinking about the idea of a reasoned existence. Most all of us, more or less, reason our way through our problems weighing possible solutions and making determinations about which options have the greatest potential for success. We do this in a thoughtful way using our powers of reasoning; the decisions made on the basis of factual evidence.

At the same time most of us harbor beliefs for which there is no factual evidence. Our fertile imaginations allow our intuitions to take us into the realm of the imaginary. Which is not to imply the only knowable truths are dependent on hard facts. Richness of existence depends on our entertaining the ephemeral, ineffable. Caution, though, must be taken to carefully sift through the counter-factual in order we assure ourselves good choices are made.

An Uneasy Exchange

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I visited with a childhood friend recently. We have known each other since elementary school and over the years have shared numerous interests, developed common sensibilities. Things change with time and experience, of course, and my friend and I have found ourselves philosophically polarized.

He has been, for quite some time now, a committed Evangelical harboring the benevolent belief Christian faith will bring serenity and peace not to mention a heavenly afterlife. I on the other hand, remain philosophically open-ended believing a pluralistic world view will produce the greatest likelihood mankind will be able to come together, to unite in a common empathy, reduce sectarian conflicts and direct us toward a peaceful future existence.

I though, unlike my friend, harbor the anxieties of real time, am unable to adapt to the closed system of religious faith, even though the vision of a sunny after-life is pretty attractive.

Delayed Gratification

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I’ve been thinking lately about how satisfying one’s desires ought to be thought about as one ages. The delayed gratification test given to young children involving one marshmallow now or two awhile later is meant, I guess, to determine a child’s sense of discipline, discernment and desires.

The idea of having it now or saving for later should, I think, be nuanced later in life as we age and our tastes and health are factored into what waiting means. At some point, when all possibilities are considered, it seems reasonable to consume and enjoy immediately.

Vicarious Pleasures

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Summers, I spend a lot of time on my back porch from where I have a clear view of my neighbor’s yard. I am able to view the comings and goings of a couple with whom, I in fact, have never exchanged more than a few words in passing. Nevertheless, observation and imagination have provided me insights into these people’s lives.

He, it is clear, is a serious fisherman in possession, as he is, of a state-of-the-art fishing boat with all the electronic gadgets necessary, I suspect, to ensure fishing success. I observe him with his wife whom he embraces as he is about to go off on one of his multi-day fishing trips. He has built his wife heart shaped flower gardens in their front yard that he dutifully tends, weeds and prunes.

In the last few months, though, I haven’t seen the wife, a fact that has me, as I sit here in my lounger, conjuring different scenarios that might explain her absence. Maybe she’s experienced a debilitating illness that has her bedridden or perhaps she’s been institutionalized for mental issues (she’s always appeared a bit unusual) or maybe the neighbor’s attentions toward her were feigned, were means of establishing a potential alibi for her disappearance, that in fact murder had occurred and she was buried in the basement; the adult sons who came by to see mom told she had gone off to live with her sister in Florida.

It’s becoming clear to me I need to find other ways of occupying my mind.

Traveling

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I’ve been traveling lately through large unfamiliar cities. Hampered, as I am, by short-term memory loss and an inability to follow directions, the visual glut and auditory din I encounter has me exhausted. I find myself lost almost immediately upon arrival at the train station (or airport or bus terminal) as I try to decipher the abstract metro maps or follow the fine lines of the tram or bus routes on the city directory the friendly information folks handout with a smile. By the time I stumble upon my lodgings and rest up a bit I have to remind myself of the danger of going off without sufficient attention to place and getting lost all over again.
The upside of it all being the realization that people the world over are open, friendly and ready to help a disoriented stranger and are, I think, appreciative that someone would be interested in visiting the place they call home.

Facing Our Ultimate Demise

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Forgive me, if you will, for dwelling on the morbid but I can’t help thinking about the ultimate aftermath, what might be awaiting us after our final demise.

The fear most of us feel when such thoughts occur, I suspect, may be about facing the unfamiliar, leaving behind the faces, placers, environment, social connections that is one’s world. if we set aside the science of biological existence which seems reasonable from a spiritual perspective most any scenario is in play. Imagination would suggest intriguing possibilities for what might come next.