Delayed Gratification

I’ve been thinking lately about how satisfying one’s desires ought to be thought about as one ages. The delayed gratification test given to young children involving one marshmallow now or two awhile later is meant, I guess, to determine a child’s sense of discipline, discernment and desires.

The idea of having it now or saving for later should, I think, be nuanced later in life as we age and our tastes and health are factored into what waiting means. At some point, when all possibilities are considered, it seems reasonable to consume and enjoy immediately.

Non-Representational Art

In the late 1940’s and early ’50’s artists painting in a non-representational manner had no language or means of conveying what they were doing. The intention was to create paintings of substance while eliminating pictorial space and figure/ground relationships. The problem being that not much could be said about what one was doing and what sort of meaning such work might have.

The result of these concerns was a move toward extreme minimalism, appreciation lying, I guess, in a Zen-like meditation on an essentially monochrome canvas. The artist Robert Irwin contemplated this orange painting for weeks moving one or the other horizontal lines up or down fractions of an inch.

Curious to consider how to interpret such a personal activity. No wonder, I suppose, why such concerns confound the viewing public and remain an esoteric interest at best.

Traveling

I’ve been traveling lately through large unfamiliar cities. Hampered, as I am, by short-term memory loss and an inability to follow directions, the visual glut and auditory din I encounter has me exhausted. I find myself lost almost immediately upon arrival at the train station (or airport or bus terminal) as I try to decipher the abstract metro maps or follow the fine lines of the tram or bus routes on the city directory the friendly information folks handout with a smile. By the time I stumble upon my lodgings and rest up a bit I have to remind myself of the danger of going off without sufficient attention to place and getting lost all over again.
The upside of it all being the realization that people the world over are open, friendly and ready to help a disoriented stranger and are, I think, appreciative that someone would be interested in visiting the place they call home.

Beauty is in the Ephemeral

I’ve been thinking lately about the nature of beauty: about how much determination of the beautiful relies on its fleeting existence.

Some might argue that art captures beauty in permanence, but I would suggest captured beauty relies on context: Michaelangelo’s virgin in his Pieta is beautiful in relation to her youthfulness and suffering. Generally, the beauty of young women relies on the ephemeral nature of their youthfulness. Similarly, determining beauty in the natural world relies on a subconscious realization of changing seasons.

Realizing beauty is an uplifting experience that might not be possible without an awareness of one’s mortality: our ephemeral existence.

Facing Our Ultimate Demise

Forgive me, if you will, for dwelling on the morbid but I can’t help thinking about the ultimate aftermath, what might be awaiting us after our final demise.

The fear most of us feel when such thoughts occur, I suspect, may be about facing the unfamiliar, leaving behind the faces, placers, environment, social connections that is one’s world. if we set aside the science of biological existence which seems reasonable from a spiritual perspective most any scenario is in play. Imagination would suggest intriguing possibilities for what might come next.

My Tragic Dental History

Having just had to go to the dentist for an issue with one of the few remaining teeth I have left has me thinking about my dental history.

At the age of twelve I lost my top four front teeth to a car dashboard (a time before seat belts). The partial dental replacement I got after that was held in place by wires around the molars, that, over the years, ate away at those supporting teeth eventually resulting in the need for an upper denture. Throughout my life I’ve become quite familiar with the dreaded root canal procedure that did preserve some of the lower molars for a while, but eventually the caps broke down and the teeth cracked.

I should, I suppose, appreciate the richness of my dental experiences; experiences that those with sound teeth never realize.

Visible Man

Progress of Civilization

I’ve been reading about an ancient village site in the near east that archaeologists have determined to have been inhabited by a people practicing plant cultivation, pottery and other technologies 2000 years before what generally has been thought to be the beginnings of the agricultural revolution, which, I guess, disrupts the linear timeline science prefers to view as the progression of civilization.
The finding suggests that some pre-historic groups chose the more sedentary lifestyle provided by agriculture while others opted for the less work intensive life of the hunter gatherer: that is domestication of plants and animals was not necessarily found to be the preferred choice of all people of time and place.
The choice may have been about preferring egalitarianism to a developing hierarchy based on material accumulation. Maybe these forward thinkers might have seen how illness and death spread amongst sedentary populations exacerbated further by diseases caused by close contact with domesticated animals.
In retrospect, in view of the ecological impact material accumulation has imposed upon us now, a simpler lifestyle was a good choice. Comfort and security, of course will always win out in the end.

Cultural Irrelevance

I almost went to the Barbie movie. So much hype seemed to promise a bit of satire, adult content, but, in the end the more likely probability of saccharine overload dissuaded me.


Which has me realizing how far out of pop cultural awareness I’ve fallen. I find popular music genres often abrasive, non-musical and generally beyond my comprehension and what passes for comedy these days is lacking in humor and rude.


Contemporary visual art, the cultural expression I’m most able to relate to I find incomprehensible at times. I find myself wondering what motivates these young artists, what their message may be. So, I’ll continue to do what suits me aware I am nowhere near the Avant guarde. I’ll trust the energy exhausted these days might arrive at useful insights about our shared experiences and not be just about hype.

A Trip to the Hospital

My fishing partner has developed an infection from a mishap that occurred a few days before our trip north. Discomfort has progressed to the point of requiring medical attention. A journey to the nearest hospital in the heart of the First Nation reservation an hour’s drive north is necessary; the facility is seriously understaffed and extremely busy, waiting room overflowing, patient rooms full, gurneys in the hallways.

Hours pass before attention is received, diagnosis critical, IV antibiotic determined necessary. Additional treatments recommended means two additional trips from fish camp to hospital.

The week ends, we proceed south aware how tenuous existence may be on the edge of civilization.

An After-Life

i’ve been thinking lately about how one might imagine an after-life. Thinking about the idea of limbo is one possibility for some. Christianity as limbo as a place of waiting, a temporary stop-over that the unbaptized deceased will occupy for long time, maybe eternity. Inhabiting such a place would likely bring on chronic ennui seeing as there is little to no chance of travel options.

There are, of course, worse destinations; purgatory for one. On the upside one may escape purgatory but penance is demanded, a bit of suffering in payment for past sins required, but if one convincingly atones for past wrongs upward movement can occur and heaven may await. But any hint of lack of sincerity may result in eternal Hell.

Eternity seems to be the serious qualifier in these end-of-life scenarios and must certainly give pause to those entertaining thoughts of what happens next, whether or not certain preparations should be considered.